Energy Management

As I journey back to full strength, my impatience sometimes gets the better of me. I want it ALL and I want it NOW! Ha. Thing is, (according to my body...), that's just not how it works. In fact, "energy management", I am realizing, is actually just a myth. The closest thing to it really, is just to go with the natural ebb and flow. In fact, why would we want to do anything else? That doesn't mean a "go with the flow" approach comes without challenges, however.

My energy comes in very uneven and often very unpredictable spurts. To some extent, I've always been that way, but never quite like this. My body thinks it needs about 10.5 hours of uninterrupted sleep per night. Tough to do when your spirit feels like it wants to catch up for the last 10 months of "down time"! Also tough to do when your body clock says midnight is bedtime and you have to get your daughter up for school at 6 am every morning.

Naptime, late afternoon around 4:30, has been a pretty sacred ritual for me over the years. Even if it only amounts to 20 minutes of peace and quiet, or silent contemplation - it's the break that refreshes. That's never been more true, or more necessary than now. However, that too cuts into my waking time.

And that waking time...well, let's just say I'm not quite as efficient as I used to be! There's a very direct correlation between my chemo brain symptoms and my level of fatigue. So...Tired = foggy, groggy, and even more quirky and distracted than usual! Words don't come as easily to my writer's brain. Sometimes, when I think they have come easily, I read it again and realize I was mistaken - ha!

Happily, those symptoms are diminishing every day, but get me tired and there's no telling what amusing mistakes I'll make! Ask my daughter...;).

Despite all that, the creative ideas keep flowing and I do what I can day-to-day. It never quite feels like "enough", but I remind myself that everything is unfolding perfectly, for everyone's best and highest good - including my own. I also know that  what we resists, persists and that frustration only uses up more precious energy.

I know that the best and most important things I can do for myself right now (or EVER!) are:

• Treat myself with unconditional love & kindness - which absolutely includes listening to my body!
• Do only what feels good - in other words (for my LOA savvy friends) get into vibrational alignment with what I want and how I want to feel.
• Appreciate - the blessings flowing to me every minute of every day! Appreciate the pleasures ready to be savored in every single moment! Appreciate and be grateful for the love that I AM and the love that surrounds me! 
• Slack off! Forced action is wasted action (hehe...I just made that up...but it's true enough!). And really, if I'm not "in the zone" I might as well be doing something else anyway because it's not going to be quality stuff...

So, when it feels good I'm working a little at a time on my book, which I have very tentatively titled "Journey Beyond Cancer". It will likely have a subtitle that gives readers a little more of an idea what's in it...namely insights, observations, advice from someone who's been there, done that. Some of it will be humorous (like funny things people say to you when you have cancer), some of it seriously philosophical, some of it my way of suggesting change.

I'm also taking on select new projects with The Write Strategy. Only work I feel really good about though and never more than I can handle (no more insane work hours or ridiculous deadlines).

And, my favorite pursuit of them all...sharing my gifts with the world through Deliberate Sensuality! I've done a few interviews and presented at a virtual conference; I'm doing some writing and I'm accepting private coaching clients. I've even got ideas for gathering ladies in my living room for casual discussions with a deliberately sensual slant!  I'm always dreaming up new products and offerings to assist anyone who wants to invite more joy and passion into their lives...If only I had time to work on all of them - RIGHT NOW! Hehe...

I make time whenever possible to "slack off" with my fabulous like-minded friends at Good Vibe University, where we learn, grow, share and chat together on a regular basis.

I'm enjoying every opportunity I get to make up for lost time with friends and family - saying yes, yes, yes to invitations to play!

As the weather gets nice, I'm finding more time for walks around my neighborhood and there will no doubt be more weekend getaways and day trips.

Perhaps if I had double the time in every day I could fit in more?? No, manipulating time is probably not my answer. More likely, I need to be content with all that I DO fit into my days and be happy that there is always something leftover to do tomorrow...otherwise, I might get bored ;).

So...if I'm not on Facebook as much, don't get my work done as fast, or don't return calls or emails right away, it's OK - rest assured, I am fitting in as much life as I can while staying conscientious about listening to my body's requests for rest. And, if you catch me doing things I'd rather not be doing just because I think I "should" (though that doesn't happen very often anymore) - remind me to check in with my feel good - and if you'd like, I'll be happy to do the same for you! Pleasure is, after all, my 2012 Word of the Year! Oh wait!! That's another blog post ;)

Wishing you a sensual-tastic day!!

Love,
Lisa